The Forum  Bookmark this conversationDark Skies 12345Last »»»»» euro  23-Oct-2006 21:09 · Reply beach……just by doing this thread you are keeping it above ground and letting people know its ok to talk about it……i didnt tell anyone for three years felt as though they would judge me and my life just on that one sentence”i nearly killed myself once”.. but i did start to talk and like i said earlier amazed at the amount of people who have also been there…..so thanks for this Message 525555. Rate Inappropriate Excellent»»»»» John-the-Clueless  23-Oct-2006 21:22 · Reply Hi OTB… I too have looked long and hard into the abyss of despair…and at times have contemplated the unthinkable (the S word)… I’m still on the long road to recovery and still have down days when everything seems to be going wrong again…The darkness never really goes away, but I try to keep things in perspective and don’t let it get to me too much… The help I have received from friends and family has been invaluable, but the treatment from the professionals (NHS) less so…I had a severe reaction to nearly all the medications that I was prescribed, and only started getting better when I had weaned myself off them… I have been lucky to find an understanding employer who ” cuts me some slack” now and then…. So I know for sure that there is Light at the end of the tunnel, just gotta keep strong and believe in myself… Good luck and good wishes to you all… Kindest Regards…. John the Clues Botherer…. Message 525585. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»» OTB 23-Oct-2006 21:22 · Reply Hi Tweetie Pie Great to be back! Thank you. Your words remind all of us that life can be a rollercoaster. I use a little trick. When friends (or others) relate some awkward, unhappy or distressing CURRENT situation, I invite them to look over their shoulder (in an imaginary way). Sometimes I even scrawl an image on a piece of paper. Its the rollercoaster image. A line going up then down then up then down then up then down again! And I remind them. Look back over your life. It is likely to look like THIS image. I then say, currently, you are here, (pointing to the low spot) then I remind them of “good stuff” they had told me in the past and ask them to point to where on the image that would be! They point to the top … It’s then easy to remind them that, whatever they feel at the moment, it CANNOT stay like that because life is a continual up and down thing emotionally… repeated again and again. Just knowing that fact can help someone GRAPHICALLY see that things will have to move on and get better … OK maybe only until the next time … but at least there is a time and space to “rectify” or “sort out” stuff! Sorry, bit long but … its true! (Particularly when someone might be temporarily blinded by upset). Beach Message 525589. RateInappropriateExcellent »» redalert 23-Oct-2006 21:27 · Reply Too many times!! Now I turn to alternative practices, a locall non-profit making ‘healing centre’. Does help.(most of the time) Unfortunately,some people when in these terrible black holes, dont always have the insight into how ill they are.Deppression is still very stigmatised, even with all your celebrities ‘coming out’. It is a medically, but not socially recognised illness. Message 525599. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»» OTB 23-Oct-2006 21:40 · Reply Euro My experience changed me. No question about that BUT I probably wouldn’t be “”Beach” or … Chris … unless I had experienced such a thing. Ironically, a few days after “wishing to take my own life”, nature gave me a life threatening DVT (A Deep Vein Thrombosis). All thoughts of “ending it” evaporated! I have a theory for that too! My emotional “being” had had enough (They were thoughts created in my intellectual forebrain and were connected with my intellect, if you like) However, when nature (and my own body) wanted to kill me, that was different. Then, a primeval, ancient “Survival” device kicked in – and I became terrified at the thought of dying! Funny eh? On an emotional level, we can make a “snap decision” to “end it all”. However, if the threat of death comes from “outside” or from another direction, our “survival” instincts are likely to kick in! Beach Message 525619. RateInappropriateExcellent»»» maggiewickedwiggle 23-Oct-2006 21:43 · Reply From my own viewpoint I can offer the following advice to anyone suffering from severe depression. Avoid medication, seek counselling and tell your friends and family how you feel, anyone who cares for you will be there I went through severe depression when my marriage broke up and my husband tried to take my children and my home from me. My GP offered no counselling, told me to go to relate, and dished out the prozac. It was the prozac that tipped me over the edge, it nullified my feelings, I cared about nothing, and that’s what made me want to take my own life. Luckily I woke up, realised that I had to get off the prozac before they killed me, and was lucky enough to get counselling, I also found who my real friends were, the ones that didn’t mind if I phoned them just to cry Message 525623. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»» euro 23-Oct-2006 21:49 · Reply beach i know what you mean…………lol……. a few months after “that day”. i was working nights on my own in an office two guys came in put shotgun to my head told me to get out they then robbed the place and petrol bombed it!!!!!!!! i ran(like one does) in bare feet to a safe place…. when police took me to hospital cos my feet were in bad way glass stones etc i hadnt felt the pain at all whilst running just knew i had to run to survive and i wanted to survive so badly……….and now i dont survive anymore i LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Message 525636. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»» euro 23-Oct-2006 21:54 · Reply yes maggie doctors did that to me when my partner died.medication does just nullify it…… as women i think we are so lucky to have our network of girly friends that we can talk to about anything and everything……. some men dont have that at all or it seems un macho to talk about ……. its a shame cos men are as human as us with same feelings and worries Message 525649. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»» OTB 23-Oct-2006 21:54 · Reply Hi JCB You are allowed “down days”. Heck, every one of us get them. I realised an interesting thing though. (This is a little difficult to communicate but relevant) Having experienced reactive depression, disassociation, night terror … etc etc, I realised that, even when I was getting better, I was falling into my own trap. I mean, because (at the time), I could be gloomy, I automatically sent myself deep, deep into thought or some morose attitude … even though I should have recognised that “It was only me having a sh*t day” like other, everyday folk. The comment is important. Its EASY to fall back into depression … over the slightest thing … OUT OF HABIT. My answer was to “examine” my own thoughts and sometimes say to myself, “Chris, it’s a bummer, its a sh*t” BUT its not worthy to send me back to that place”. I developed a mantra. “IF I have to worry, I’ll only worry about BIG STUFF! So far, that philosophy is working for me. Beach Message 525652. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»» maggiewickedwiggle 23-Oct-2006 21:59 · Reply maybe Euro that is why the suicide rate is so high in young men. I have a male friend who when I was rocking in a corner would drive over from Nottingham to hug me, even though when I was angry with life he was the one who got the grief, he never retaliated, but was always be there for me, I dont think i would be here now if it wasn’t for him. But like you and ONB I;m now happy to be alive, yes I still have black days, who doesn’t but I try everyday to count my blessings Ihave a homea job lovely children enough to eat and good friends who care about me thats a lot more than a lot of people have Message 525666. Rate InappropriateExcellent»»»»»» OTB 23-Oct-2006 22:07 · Reply Are there rules about numbers of replies to comments? My reply posting to JCB failed 3 times and hasn’t appeared online! Want to reply to everyone else but … concerned there is a glitch. Back soon. Beach Message 525681. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»» JayBristol 23-Oct-2006 22:11 · Reply Hi Allas i said, OTB a particularly well timed thread, Rick’s funeral is tomorrow, I had posted a thread in his memory before seeing and adding to yours. On both threads I have read of your strengths and it has helped me, knowing that I/we can post on here, amongst peers, from a common standpoint, without fear, knowing that what we have written will be treated with reverence and respect. One thing I would say to anyone and everyone, If you feel that a friend of yours is troubled, Help them in ANY way you can!! Jay Message 525699. Rate InappropriateExcellent»»»»»»» JayBristol 23-Oct-2006 22:16 · Reply Hi OTB,no restriction on number of replies, You might have triggered a “sensitive” word that will need the reply to be vetted by SysAdmins before going public. Jay P.S. A Very Sincere Thank You for this thread Message 525719. Rate InappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» selkie 23-Oct-2006 22:28 · Reply Maggie-may, I appreciate that you have had your own difficult experiences but I really must raise issue with you advising people with severe depression to avoid medication. This is highly reckless and is possibly encouraging people to place themselves at risk. Medication may not have worked for you and it is not for everyone, but for some people it is literally a lifesaver. It is also contra to the rules of the site to advise people in so irresponsible a manner. I don’t usually write with such directness on the site but felt I had to. Selkie Message 525764. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» maggiewickedwiggle 23-Oct-2006 22:34 · Reply Thanks Selkie, I did put that it was from my own viewpoint and my own experience, i wish that I had listened to the countless people who told me to avoid medication, I would probably be still married it I have of, and I certainly wouldnt have contemplated taking my own life if is wasn’t for prozac It is simply my experience and my point of view, each to their own Message 525775. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» kiwikev 23-Oct-2006 22:40 · Reply I agree with Maggie May evry one is and individual case .5years ago I became very depressed and was not sure what to do I rang my GP and told her Iwas not sure what I was going to do .She got me help from a great team and put me on the right medication .I now do volunteer work with people with mental health and I know alot of them need their Medication I no longer use medication but would always direct them to take the advice given .The main thing is to listen we all need some one to listen …ill shut up now .. Message 525786. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» selkie 23-Oct-2006 22:42 · Reply Cheers maggie for the nice response, I didn’t mean it as a personal attack and I’m sorry if it came across a bit aggressive, but just felt I should put the other side of things. It sounds like you had a bad experience, that’s a shame, but many people find medication helpful, along with counselling or therapy. Each person should look into it for themselves in conjunction with discussing it with their GP or specialist mental health service. Selkie x Message 525790. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» maggiewickedwiggle 23-Oct-2006 22:44 · Reply Selkie, this has brought back a lot of memories for me, but it’s good that people are brave enough to talk about their experience,, I’m very sure that reading this thread will have helped at least one person who has read it x Message 525796. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» kiwikev 23-Oct-2006 22:50 · Reply sorry selkie meant too agree with you my apologies kk Message 525809. RateInappropriateExcellent»»»»»»»» selkie 23-Oct-2006 22:51 · Reply I’m sorry that the thread has brought back bad memories for you, and I hope that you are in a better place now. You are right, it is good to talk about these things. It is the most awful thing to go through and not always easy to talk about with our nearest and dearest. More discussion of these kinds of difficulties also helps to lessen the stigma around mental health difficultes. Message 525811. RateInappropriateExcellent12345Last Back to top | |
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